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(upon seeing the geico mail in the trash)

Shawn: Mom, did Geico give you money?

Mom: No.

Shawn: Geico. Way to live better and get better children.

Caterpillars

When Shawners discovered over 20 caterpillars on his parsley plant that he planted just to get caterpillars the year before he says he is, "the luckiest boy in the whole city, except if someone else has a bigger parsley plant." He also said he's, "King of the Sea." Not sure what that had to do with!

Bugs

Shawn: You know that bee or wasp i saw outside?

Mom: Yes.

Shawn: It wasn't a bee or a wasp. it was a half bee half wasp. do they have those things?

Mom: Yes, i think they are called hornets or yellow jackets.

Shawn: It didn't have a yellow jacket. do they like you if you leave them alone?

Mom: I don't think so. They are pretty aggressive even if you leave them alone. So it's probably best to stay inside while he's out there.

(Shawn goes to window, rolls up blinds to look out)

Shawn: Where is that bee slash wasp?

Upon himself

Shawners, after seeing pictures of himself as a baby at the forbidden palace in Katy, Texas, and hearing we could go there again:

"Awesome! And i can really see it and i can remember it and know i was there!"

Tummy Aches

My tummy hurts. But not like achey, achey, achey. Just half an ache.

Cute All Over

I had several conversations with Shawners today that made me want to just eat him. The first one was regarding a stuffed snake he bought yesterday at his kindergarten field trip at Crowe's Nest Farm. On the way home from school he tells me the name of his snake is, "Snakey Shawners (our last name)". Then he says, "You know why? Because he is in our family." He proceeds to tell me all of his animals are named "Animal Name"y Shawners (our last name) because they are "all in our family".

Later he asks me, "What is your middle name?" I explained that I use my middle name for my first name, then told him my full name - first, middle, and last. He corrects me by saying, "Really, it's Mommy (middle name) (last name)."

Cheetah Man

I couldn't stop laughing at Shawn's black spots he drew with permanent marker all over his hands to try and make himself into a cheetah.